“Nice weather we’re having, isn’t it?” “Have I told you about my recent surgery?” “How ‘bout them Seahawks?”
Conversations like these can make a party fail miserably. Good party conversation is as essential to a party as keeping the cocktails flowing. Part of the party host’s job is to get good conversation going and keep it going.
Particularly with larger groups of people who might not be otherwise acquainted, it’s important that the party host include all guests into a conversation. The best hosts are those who bring every party guest into an interesting conversation seamlessly and gracefully.
Tips on Party Conversation
- Get a conversation started by starting to talk about yourself. Tell about a recent vacation, a wedding you attended, a great book you just read, and then listen while others jump in with their own contribution.
- Steer away from religion and politics as conversation topics. Even though those two hot topics can stimulate some fascinating conversation, until you know your guests well enough to know that no one will be offended, avoid them. Hurt feelings and flaring tempers are not party material.
- If you’ve got a party guest who is shy, doesn’t know many people at the party, and is not being included in a conversation, bring him into the fray by directing your next comment specifically to him. Talking directly to someone, making eye contact and using his name will instantly draw him into the conversation and give him a much needed opening in which to add something.
- You’ve worked hard to orchestrate a party conversation and it changes gears, changes subjects and takes off on its own. Don’t ruin it by trying to bring it back. Let the party conversation take off on its own when it doesn’t need you anymore.
- Look around the group you’re in before you toss in a conversation starter. How likely are they to want to talk about the current season of Project Runway? How interested will they be in your discovery of a foot fungus cream? Keep in mind your guests’ ages, occupations and interests before you start a conversation.
- Everybody likes to talk about himself. Even the quietest people, when they talk, want to talk about themselves. Ask questions in which people can jump in with their opinion, thoughts and story. As a successful party host, be a good listener. Only talk about yourself to get the conversation back on track or to jump start a lull.
Games for Sparking Conversation
The ultimate game-for-purchase for party conversation is Table Topics, a box of cards printed with conversation starters. Table Topics comes in different editions for different types of parties, such as Family Gathering, Girls Night Out and Couples. Questions like “If you could name the street you live on, what would you call it?” are sure to get your guests thinking and talking.
Some boxed board games are specifically designed to get players to know each other better and get conversations and friendships off and running. Gift Trap, Questionary, Boxers or Briefs, What’s Yours Like? and Loaded Questions require players to reveal funny and trivial information about themselves.
Apples to Apples, Balderdash, Smarty Party and other popular games are great for putting your guests at ease and getting everyone acquainted..
Games that are played with teams – Taboo, Pictionary, charades, Trivial Pursuit and others – are a great way to get strangers to become friends at a party. Put together teams of people who are not acquainted with one another, and play the games early in the evening, so for the rest of the party your guests will be comfortable with one another.
Party Conversation Starters
When you’re in a small group and just want to get the conversation rolling, here are a few things you can say to almost anyone.
- “What are your plans for the weekend?”
- “I just finished the best book; what are you guys reading?” Or “I just saw the best movie? Have you seen any good movies lately?”
- “I’m having the best/worst time with my new computer/new software.” Be prepared to get an overload of advice and recommendations. People love to talk about their computers as much as they like to talk about their children and pets.
- "Do you play any musical instruments? Do you wish you could play one?"
Ideas for Organized Group Conversations
In larger gatherings, if you want to start a more organized discussion, try some of these conversation starters. “What if” questions are fun because you get to use your imagination, and reveal something about yourself.
- “If you were going to be alone on a deserted island and could only take one movie, one music CD and one book, what would you take?”
- “What is one thing about yourself that no one here knows about you?”
- “If there is such a thing as reincarnation, what would you like to come back as in your next life?”
- “If you could invent something that would make life easier, what would it be?”
- “In the movie about your life, who would play you? Who would play your spouse? Your friends and family?”
- “Everybody name one thing you learned this week that you didn’t know before.”
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